Pleasure Coach Tyomi Morgan Shares Her Sexpert Insights

At CAM4 we are always delighted to spotlight industry experts.  Please help us welcome – Tyomi Morgan. A Certified ‘Sexologist’, she is a specialist in almost every position (pun intended) possible in the field of sexual wellness and comfort.

Tyomi is a multi-hyphenate in the world of sexual wellness!

Not only is she well known as a sex therapist, Tyomi is an accomplished consultant, speaker, educator, activist and entrepreneur. Not only that, but she is also the founder of The Cowgirl Workout, and much more! Her background and skills, including being an authentic Tantra practitioner, mean that she is able to promote the benefits of mind, body and soul that are directly impacted by our connection with sexual wellness.

Tyomi’s approach to sexual education is about bettering your sex life using holistic practices. Her openness in hosting conversations on social media have paved the way for communities right across the globe to feel seen and appreciated. Tyomi doesn’t believe in censorship, when it comes to sexual comfort, and she strives to ensure that everyone knows themselves as a sexual being.

CAM4 Interview with Tyomi Morgan

Read below or watch the interview to gain more insight:

Can you please start out by introducing yourself and telling us a little about the scope of your work in the sexual wellness field?

Tyomi Morgan: Hey everyone, I’m Tyomi Morgan. To give you an overview of what I do, I work with women to help them to live more orgasmic lives, both inside and outside of the bedroom. I like to host public discussions (via social media) about sexuality, so that it becomes a normalized part of our day-to-day conversation. I also really enjoy helping people to deepen their experiences with pleasure, right across the spectrum. Not just sexual pleasure, but also pleasures outside the bedroom, including sensual, emotional and spiritual, because they all feed into the overall sexual pleasure we enjoy.

Outside of sexual health I’m also an intimacy coordinator for film and television, which means I’m the person who helps with mainstream filming sets. I do get hired for adult sets too, but of course on adult sets it’s all about real sex, whereas for mainstream film and television, it’s all simulated. Therefore, when filming includes scenes of nudity or intimacy, I’m there to ensure that the ‘closed set’ protocols are adhered to, including maintaining the actors’ boundaries, whilst also upholding the creative vision required by the director.

I’m also the founder of The Cowgirl Workout, where I’m providing one-on-one coaching with people, and I also coordinate the seminar series for EXXXOTICA Expo. They run four seminar shows a year in the US, and every single class and speaker who attends the show does so for free. I handpick the speakers and classes, covering each three-day seminar schedule. I also speak at the seminar series, as well at each show, so I do keep myself quite busy. 

What made you want to make a difference to people’s sexual lives – Where did the initial flame of inspiration come from?

Tyomi Morgan: It all started with a conversation I had with my dad. It was back in 2008 / 2009 and I was modeling at the time, mostly just acting and the like, and my dad said, “well you’re getting some success with this, which is really great, but your writing skills are prolific – You need to be writing!” Blogging was a big thing at that time, so I decided to start a blog myself. At first I started with fashion, but it didn’t feel as impactful as I would want it to be. I started thinking about topics that I knew a lot about, and I could talk about without getting tired of the subject, and so I decided on sex, because I had already studied it.

I spent a lot of time studying the physiological and psychological parts of sex, as well as Tantra and other similar themes, and then when I started having sex I started experimenting with all of those things. Then I was learning from it and talking to others about it, such as doctors, as I have always been very curious about it. When I thought about all the things that I was going through as a woman, I wondered about who I should talk to outside of scheduling an appointment to go and talk to my doctor, since I didn’t have a therapist at the time. I didn’t even know sex therapists existed then, so I said to myself “who do I talk to?”

I started to question, “where do I go online for reputable resources, who can I talk to that sounds like me?” Then I decided that I was going to start a sex blog, and that’s what I did. This was before the big boom around sex blogging and being a sex or intimacy coach, or something similar, it was just like the old wild west. YouTube was just getting started, Twitter was getting off the ground, and there was no TikTok, Instagram or Snapchat. It was just MySpace, YouTube and Twitter in its infancy. I got started and things just took off from there. 

I wanted to serve as a representation for anybody that resonates with my voice, but especially for black women. This is because I haven’t really seen any prominent figures like that in the media, none that have been promoted that are black, or looked like me, or could literally speak to someone like me. And so, I’m very happy to say that I now know that I have influenced an entire generation of people, people that look like me, to live their lives ‘out loud’. To live out their sexual desires, and to fulfill their sex lives in a healthier and more conscious way. I’m also excited about what the next 20 years’ will look like, especially whilst doing this work. 

Having achieved so much already, can you tell us how long you have been working in this field?

Tyomi Morgan: It’s been about 12 years. However, I will say that although I’ve been focused on one thing for 12 years, I’m not still not tired of it. This work is great, and I love it here. I know that I have influenced an entire generation of people, and that’s so beautiful. Even when I travel, whether it’s in the city where I live now or back at home in Chicago, or even internationally, there will be at least one person who knows who I am, and that still surprises me. 

Discussing sex is more acceptable today, but it was less so when you started out. What were the challenges in introducing this subject matter to the world back then?

Tyomi Morgan: I will admit that, quite surprisingly, it took off very quickly. People were paying attention to it and the thing that they were most interested in, was having someone who’s attractive writing these things, and saying them with validity. Some people, such as doctors etc., have even tried basing themselves on the things that I’ve been talking about. There were a handful of people who were saying, “oh my gosh!” However, the majority of people were saying, “this beautiful woman is saying all these things – I can’t believe this. How do you know about this? How old are you?” 

People were asking how I could possibly know so much about sex, especially being attractive. The general images people have of sex educators are older white women and men, so having a beautiful black woman come and talk to them was refreshing. I also like to pushback sometimes, especially where I get attacked by trolls. It’s mostly been men who were upset that I was talking about these things, and they would always try to argue with me, or call me out. Back then I had more time on my hands, so I used to go toe-to-toe with them, because I’m quite witty and good with my words. 

It was internet radio when I started out, and I started getting some interviews, and I was actually very surprised that people were really interested in what I had to say. They then became interested in knowing more, and I was really surprised at how little people actually know. Even for people like me, living in my world, there is so much more to know about, so I’m always a student of life and this subject matter. Yet I do know that what I find normal or average, is so far ahead of the average person.

I do find myself having to revisit topics, or reintroduce the same topic in a different way, because people don’t necessarily retain things in the same way, as opposed to hearing a conversation or seeing the conversation happening. It doesn’t hit them straight away, but then it hits them at another time. Therefore, the challenges have really just been about protecting myself online from people who seek to attack me, simply because they have their own beliefs about women, and about women’s sexuality. 

Do you find yourself still in a challenging environment, with regards to business or collaborative opportunities – Do you have to remind them of the validity of your work? 

Tyomi Morgan: No, and I can honestly say that I feel very blessed, because even from the beginning of my career, I didn’t have to fight very hard to feel that what I was doing was valid. When I speak, I speak with authority, clarity and confidence, so if you decide to go up against me, then you need to be ready for some kind of rebuttal or debate.

Once I had my blog and glamerotica101.com, I then started writing for other publications, and all these things together have provided a type of validation for me. Of course,the average person doesn’t even know that someone like me exists – a sex coach or pleasure coach – so it’s very fascinating to them. Every time I tell somebody what I do, they’re always asking if I have a card to give them!

In essence, it hasn’t been much pushback for me. However, it has been a huge blessing to get a lot of businesses, and be involved in multiple companies. I’ve even had individual people wanting to book me for events and so on. They come to me because they’ve heard me on a podcast or internet radio show, or they read an article that I’ve written, or they’ve seen me on TV, which is great for me.

Due to social stigmatism, sex education has become a crisis. Why is there such a distance in sexual comfort between sex-positive people like yourself, and the average person?

Tyomi Morgan: It lets me know that countries like America have no interest in really investing deeply in standard general education around sexual health. And we’re not just talking abstinence education and STI prevention, we’re talking about the full spectrum of sexual identity, of gender identity, and of pleasure. Pleasure is not a part of the sex education curriculums that currently exist on a state level, because there is no federal regulation for it. It’s left up to each state, and then each state leaves it up to each district for their schools, and so on. There’s a lack of information, as well as incorrect information out there, and it makes me feel sad. On one hand some people will never have the information they need, because they don’t even know where to go look for it. Yet, it also excites me since I have the opportunity to impact people even further.

When I meet somebody who doesn’t know me or doesn’t know what I do, or they don’t know that someone like me exists, it’s an educational moment – the teacher glasses come out! I try to stay on the optimistic high-side of things, because that sadness is really like empathy. Since I have empathy for people, I can talk simply to people, and it always surprises me how impactful I can be. When somebody asks me, especially men, “what can you teach me about sex?” I’m like a comedian, and then they want me to tell them a joke. This happens to me all the time, especially when I say that I’m a sex coach. Next, people want me to teach them something, and when I do they say, “everybody knows that,” but actually, they don’t. That’s because they’re not being told about it, and we are so behind in this area.

Having such a wide range of expertise, how do you stay up to date and as informed as possible – Where are you doing your research? 

Tyomi Morgan: Firstly, I look to other experts in the field, and what they’re talking about. Some of them are very academic in research, very forward, and so I will pay attention to their pages to see what new studies they’re talking about. I will then go and read the studies, as well as keeping up with the latest books. To give an example, let’s look at May, which is both masturbation month and mental health awareness month. What I will do, is to take those two things and go off and do my research around each topic, such as the impact of mental health on sexuality. Then I will look at the impact of masturbation, or self-pleasure, on a person’s mood. In essence, I’m paying attention to those researchers who are out there, and then staying on top of my studies. I’m also a member of the National Coalition for Sexual Health, and they have a lot of information that is sent out periodically, which helps me keep on top of things.

Of all the many projects and initiatives that you’ve led, of all those accomplishments, what are you most proud of? 

Tyomi Morgan: One of the things I am always proud of, is going to Africa and teaching my fellow brothers and sisters about how to open up. Even before going there physically, my presence is always there virtually, because they follow me online. First off, in Nigeria, it’s not easy to get a visa, let alone going there and setting up a press tour. Then it’s setting up a ‘sold out’ event and being on TV, and so, being amongst the people was one of the biggest accomplishments.

Next was Kenya. My original trip was scheduled for 2020, however the day of my flight was also the day the entire world shut down, so I promised them I would come and do a class for them. I went there in 2023, and it was such an amazing experience to have not only one, not two, but three ‘sold out’ events. I must give a shout out to my friend Kaz Lucas, for helping me put that together. She’s also a sex educator in Kenya, so she’s on the ground doing this work. It’s not easy to do that work in Kenya, especially when it’s so close to Uganda. Uganda has its own ideas around sexuality, especially with regards to the LGBTQ+ community.

Therefore, I felt very proud to have an international following and to be able to travel, and touch those people’s lives. Not only in Africa, but in the UK, the Caribbean, and everywhere else that I’ve traveled. It just feels really good knowing that thanks to the technology of the internet, I have been able to touch lives all over, and that I’m welcomed wherever I go.

Being from America, and living there, I get to freely do this work without persecution, and I consider that a huge blessing. It allows me to work safely from here, and I can reach the masses around the world thanks to technology. Then I get to travel and meet people, and impact those people in person. After all, a lot of times I think that Americans don’t want to engage, as they are pompous and arrogant, so when I say I’m coming somewhere and then I show up, they can’t believe I’m there.

That then deepens the bond between me and the people who follow me, and even if they don’t show up in person, the fact that they see me online, it’s like they actually came in person. It deepens the respect level and so I believe that the value people place on me, when they see me ‘putting my money where my mouth is’, is knowing I’m investing in going there and engaging with everyone. To me that is the biggest thing, because touring internationally is not an easy thing, and to put it all together is not easy either.

It’s inspirational how you organize yourself as effectively as you do. Are there any insights you can share with us?

Tyomi Morgan: It’s worth noting that I really don’t feel like I’m that organized. To be honest, I actually feel like I need to be more organized than I am, especially when it comes to my social media. I did have an assistant, and I will be hiring a replacement, and she told me I was really organized, yet I feel like I’m always in chaos. However, for the most part I am working on a particular project, so I will make sure that I complete all the tasks in that project before moving on to another.

I have a whiteboard right in front of me, so I know what I need to focus on. I set reminders on my phone and I’m really getting to the point where being organized is actually helping me with my mental health. I can be very specific about what I’m going to post, what I’m going to produce, and how it’s going to be produced. By having it all written out, I have clear direction that allows me to be able to execute things, and execute them quickly. Of course, I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not perfect, but I’m definitely improving in the structure of my business. 

When I went to Nigeria to do my class, I connected with other women in Nigeria who do similar to what I do, as far as being a sex coach. They were more than happy to help me find a venue, bringing in their podcasts or TV shows, and I was like part of a community, which is what I love. One thing I will say though is, It’s been women who have really helped and supported me, and propped me up throughout my career. It’s women who’ve opened up their pocketbooks to invest in themselves and learn more. They’re the ones that have actually heard the calls to action.

When it’s something about self improvement, women are straight there, as well as the female coaches and therapists, who are willing to listen to and help me. I would also like to give a shout out to Dr. Laura Berman, because I had seen her on TV before I even started this work, and she really inspired me. And so, I used to quote her and reference her a lot. I remember two of her colleagues coming to see one of my seminars at EXXXOTICA Expo, and they said that Dr. Berman would be so proud.

I’m so proud to be a beacon for people and to show them what life can look like when you own your sexuality, and when you own who you are. Then you just need to do what you say you’re going to do. If you do it and it’s successful and it’s impactful, you can keep rinsing and repeating. Now I get to pat myself on the back, because I’ve done some amazing things, as well as a lot of things that I have forgotten about, which is easy to do when you’re going so fast.

As we all know, life gets better when we are more positive in our approach. With that in mind, how does life improve with sex positivity? 

Tyomi Morgan: If you think about sexuality in itself, it is at the very core of who we are, and no matter what your identification is, when you can embrace that, you literally have the master key. There are so many entities in this world that are trying to suppress or repress our sexuality, or our awareness about it, and so you have to ask yourself why that is. Well, it’s because this is a very powerful aspect of who we are. If you think about it, Sexual energy is creative energy. It is the sexual energy and the combining of the two bodies in the act. Being able to own the feelings around that, and the desire for sexual connection, even just like the fantasies that we have or the feelings that we have about ourselves, and how we present as sexual beings, this thing is also creative. 

Even if you’re not interacting with people physically, the fact that you can use your sexual energy as a creative springboard to literally propel your ideas and your desires into the collective consciousness, that’s powerful in itself. You don’t know what you can do, if you don’t even know the spectrum of what exists, especially when it comes to our sexuality and our sexual wellbeing. What’s interesting is that even with people who are virgins, or people who decided to be a lifelong celibate, they’ve had sex and they still want to be acknowledged. They still want to interact in the conversations, because this is at our core, like a pillar of who we are as humans.

Being able to feel comfortable with the conversations, being able to feel comfortable with expressing how you feel, and how you want to identify, it all helps you along in life’s experiences so much easier. When you don’t feel pressured around sex, if you’re not having it or you’re being judged negatively for how you want to show up in your gender identity or sexual identity, then you feel like you can move throughout life with more peace and ease. I know that there is a level of confidence and self awareness that I have, and knowing that I can either keep my sexual energy to myself, and use it as creative energy to attract things to me in life that I want to experience, or I can use that sexual energy to connect with other like-minded beings who are just like me, who are going to pour into me and fill me up with good energy.

Because we’ve generated so much good pleasure, not only are we going to have a great experience in that moment, but we’re going to leave feeling like we’re energized, ready to take on the day. This is because our bodies literally get a reset, so all these beautiful, wonderful and delicious chemicals get released into the bloodstream. It literally can be a physical and a mental reset. I am just here to advocate for people to love themselves, to seek out pleasure in every aspect of it, especially sensual pleasure, because sensuality and sexuality are in parallel. They’re not quite the same, but people often make them synonymous. If people could just learn to advocate for their pleasure, then life gets better across the spectrum. Whether you’re having sex or not, whether you’re a sexual person, asexual person on the spectrum, it doesn’t matter. Just simply advocate for your pleasure and intimacy.

Turning our attention to The Cowgirl Workout, it’s obvious you understand about the physicality here too. Can you please tell our creators how to minimize aches and pains whilst performing on cam?

Tyomi Morgan: First and foremost, stay hydrated, because your muscles will let you know when you’re dehydrated because they will ache, which is when you’ll start to pop and creak. Next is to stretch, and I cannot stress this enough. Stretching is going to help your muscles to not only be more relaxed and limber, but it will prevent some of those aches and pains that you feel. This is especially noticeable if you are a creator that sits down, not moving much, and you’re simply talking directly to a screen. Sitting down is definitely going to make your lower back and hips stiffer, so you want to stretch. Not just lower body, but upper body too.

Then take a moment to give yourself a mental break, to do some deep breathing. This can help to regulate your nervous system, and to give your eyes a break from the screen too. Remember, glare from the computer screen can impact your eyes over time, you can get sleepy, droopy eyes, so just take a moment to go somewhere else within your space. You can tell your viewers that you want to show them how you take care of yourself, in between taking care of them. Tell them you’re going to take this moment to connect with yourself. Close your eyes for a second because you’ve been at this for a while and you’re inviting them into your self care practice. Basically you get to be a leader in health and wellness by showing your viewers how you take care of your own health and wellness.

So remember, stay hydrated, stretch, close your eyes for a second, do breathing exercises, and also please remember to eat. Make sure you take a break to put something in your body, and not just junk food, but healthy fresh foods that can also help you with your water intake. All of this will help you stay vibrant and sexy on camera. That’s my advice for all you creators, and remember that I’m right there with you.

Thank you so much for your wisdom. Can you please let everyone know what you’ve got coming up, and how people can connect with you?

Tyomi Morgan: First off, I’ll be doing a few spot dates in person for The Cowgirl Workout, and you can find details on my Instagram. I’ll also be at the EXXXOTICA Expo Miami, New Jersey, and DC, and all of those dates are shown on the website, that way you can plan to either come see me, or just come and enjoy the show generally. Also, just to reiterate, our seminars are free, so you can sit in and listen to these experts to enhance your connection with your own sexuality, as well as your sexual expression. 

I also host lifestyle events. So for those of you who are into playing with others, consensually, I will be hosting a few events around America. I’m starting my own luxury lifestyle travel group, and I’m going to Hedonism II in Jamaica in August, so if you want to come and have a great time with an awesome group of people, go to worstbehaviortour.com.

You can also follow me on social media, and all links are provided below, where you will find lots of information about me and what’s coming up. Also please follow Glamerotica101, and the social details are also given below.

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CONNECT WITH TYOMI MORGAN
Twitter: @Glamazontyomi
IG: @realglamazontyomi
Glamerotica101: glamerotica101.com
IG: @glamerotica101
YouTube: @GLAMerotica101
Cowgirl Workout: thecowgirlworkout.com

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