Dirty Talk

Dirty Talk – Reading time approx: 20 minutes

Dirty Talk can sometimes be hot and wild, sometimes gloomy and rough, and sometimes quite spontaneous – in most beds the words are used to provide the ‘kick’ during sex.

Talking dirty can make your sex life more creative, liberated and intense – without much effort!

If your partner quietly whispers something in your ear, it puts the hairs on your neck stand up, and you get goosebumps – then you’ve done everything right!

But how exactly do you actually “talk dirty“? Is it possible to learn, and when exactly is kinky language considered inappropriate? And what is this secret technique in which you can get someone to orgasm without touching them?

The answers to these questions, further tips and some examples of its application can be found in this article!

So, let’s get going then!

What exactly is “Dirty Talk”?

The uninhibited, lustful proliferate of your sexual feelings and desires during the sexual act is colloquially called “Dirty Talk”.

As the name suggests, this is dirty, kinky language that makes you and your partner even hotter, and brings some momentum to your love life. In some cases it may even make you feel sexy.

By the way, talking dirty via a text message is known as ‘Sexting‘. You should definitely try this one!

It’s about being able to freely pronounce sentences and words that may be taboos in your normal life, and thereby setting no limits to your imagination.

Only about 40% to 44% of people talk dirty during sex. But more than 94% of women are not averse to trying Dirty Talk as a newcomer to the bedroom.

On the contrary, they even said that they’d like to have a night in this kinky way!

There is therefore a huge gap between the actual state and the desired state in the sex life of most people.

The fear of many men to do something wrong when talking dirty, or to be in the wrong place in general, may of course be justified.

But the statistics of many people certainly reveal that most women are open to dirty/kinky language.   But this kinky pleasure maker can also quickly go pants and rather cause embarrassing silence, or even very confused looks.

To make sure that this doesn’t happen to you, you’ll find some useful hints and tips below!

Caution: ‘Dirty Flirting’ is something else!

Although it may sound similar, Dirty Flirting is more about everyday situations that are upset by conspicuously erotic/sexy actions.

These include, for example, the forgotten panties in the car, the enjoyable slip on the ice while walking, or a deep look into his eyes as you bite into a juicy doughnut.

It depends less on the words and much more on your body language. Although Dirty Talk is usually closely related to Dirty Flirting, it is always good to know what exactly is being said here.

But when exactly is dirty language appropriate?

The answer is actually quite simple – if you are both horny!

There’s probably nothing more unerotic than someone whispering kinky things in your ear while you’re relaxing, enjoying your morning coffee or having an important phone call. Here talking dirty is rather inappropriate, annoying and in most cases will have a foolish and less than erotic effect.

It depends on the right sensitivity.  Does she look deep into your eyes all evening long, she touches herself again and again as if by chance, and makes her often insinuations?

Then the chances look good, but don’t forget to start very slowly. But more on that later!

The 1×1 of Dirty Talk

“Can I learn that?”

This is probably one of the most common questions that arises with the topic of “Dirty Talk”, and the answer is yes!

With a bit of sensitivity and the right technique, each of us should become a language expert in bed.

However, you should also be careful if you want to learn to talk dirty, as it’s not something you can teach yourself with a bit of technical guidance and successive steps.

From first time to becoming a master of dirty language, has more to do with the unlearning of shame and inhibitions than with appropriately used predetermined sentences.

That is why a memorized and calculated approach is seen as hindering and reluctant. Use the Dirty Talk examples from this article as inspiration, but don’t be emotive, only to rattle them out like a set of vocabulary.

Shy people will take a little longer to do so before they can drop all inhibitions, and feel comfortable. But once this hurdle has been overcome, nothing stands in the way of this fun in bed!

The more important question, however is: is my partner even on something like this?

No-one is helped if you blurt out your desires and your counterpart just wants to enjoy the silence during the sexual act. Remember, talking dirty always has two sides.

Nobody for Dirty Talk? Try with her!

Likewise, if your partner is not interested in dirty puns, just accept it.

As with many sexual pleasure-bringers,  you can’t force anyone to do so, and forced or memorized Dirty Talk isn’t really appealing nor erotic, if we’re being honest with ourselves.

Start slowly!

Here we come back to the sensitivity of speech.

If you’re still sitting comfortably on the sofa and watching a movie, it’s no use to just slap in a “I want to really f**k you hard” in her ear.

In the rarest of cases, such a remark may bring miracles, as in bed that requires groping.

If you don’t dare to say the “properly kinky” stuff yet, you can also start with a simple “you look so good”.

Dirty talking can get down to business later, but anything that can make your partner feel hot is allowed!

Whether you’re screaming, whispering, talking fast or slow it’s entirely up to you. Above all, talking dirty is supposed to be fun and certainly not to convey the feeling of coercion.

Find out what things you and your partner like best. What you say when, and above all how it’s left only to you – your preferences and your courage!

The right voice

The sound makes the music!

Although this point is often overlooked, the right tone plays an important role to help with Dirty Talk.

Or to put it another way – would you find it hot to be whispered compliments in the voice tone of your old math teacher? Certainly not, and your partner certainly won’t.

Researchers have found, for example that women are considered particularly attractive when speaking with a relatively high, but also delicate voice.  

Of course, there are also limits. The words were not allowed to sound too high, screaming or many beeps.

Men on the other hand, are always considered pleasant and attractive when they speak with a deep and rough voice.  

But even deep is not always the same deep. Rough and harsh sounds are rather daunting for women and may only be used just before the climax.

Be direct!

Dirty Talk is characterized, among other things, by direct inaccurate statements.

A “I’m just a bit hot, maybe you’re going to increase the tempo now?” isn’t as horny as a clear “Take me harder!”.

If you’re a bit unsure what you want to say, just think about exactly how you feel right now.

A quiet “I’m so incredibly hot and horny over you” can be a very good start and isn’t too far below the belt.

Whether your desires, feelings or your thoughts are right in that moment – you can let everything go free.

Dirty Talk No-Go’s!

The art of dirty language may be liberating, but unfortunately it is not a free ticket to everything.

Here too, you have to know your partner very well and know what you can say and what you can’t, everyone has different tastes and preferences, remembering them is a great help!

However, there are some golden rules that should be avoided for safety.

“I want a child off you!” may be moaned in full lust, but both partners should be aware that this is not meant seriously. Or at least not at that point in time.

Quite a few men get a shock at the sentence and the lust drops somewhere between the thought of nappies and strollers – not a great way to feel sexy!

While we are on the subject, baby language and trivialization are also an absolute taboo in the bedroom, and can lead to insecurity rather than looseness and sexiness.

When you are talking in his best piece, like a little kid (“Yes, what do we have there?”) or something like that, you play to his erotic mood faster than you can watch.

The same goes for nicknames for you or your partner. Incorrectly approached, you run the risk of completely overturning the mood and thus irritating rather than stimulating.

Sure, if you’re used to nicknames like “Tiger” and “Stallion” the whole thing can get a completely different effect, but out of nowhere and without context, you shouldn’t throw something like that into the room.

Likewise, harsh insults and swear words require a good dose of sensitivity. If your girlfriend is already prone to insecurities and doubts about her figure, it doesn’t go down well when you call her “fat pig” in the middle of the act; even if you like to find it horny at that moment.

If your using insults when you talk dirty, you slowly grope yourself at the beginning, if you notice your partner tolerates something like this well, and is even spurred on by it, then you can quietly switch it up a gear.

Sexy templates to apply

If you have become curious now and want a great way to get yourself prepared, then we have provided some good, classic templates for husband and wife!

Maybe one or the other inspires you, or you read it as a suggestion together with your partner!

Before sex

• You smell so incredibly good…
• When I look at you, I get such a tingling sensation everywhere…
• I’m not wearing underwear right now…
• Your pussy will be moist before I even touch it.
• When I hear your voice, I have to think of your wild moaning from last time.
• Touching your body alone feels incredibly good…
• I just can’t stop thinking about your dick/pussy…
• I want to see you here again in 5 minutes, but naked!
• Take me out and give it to me!
• If we are alone afterwards, I will make sure that you can no longer think clearly…
• I want to touch you everywhere!
• You look so incredibly hot in his shirt/dress, I’d love to rip it off you now…

Also a good way to make your partner horny are specifically used questions!

Our brain is programmed in such a way to immediately think about an answer to a question, so that you almost automatically take care of arousing thoughts with your partner! Have Dirty Talk with her now!

• Would you like to feel my tongue on your skin?
• What would you do to me now if I was at your mercy?
• Do you think you’re going to get wet if I touch you down there now?
• How do you think my cock tastes at this moment?
• Would you rather have my tongue in your mouth, or in your pussy?
• Can you imagine my hands caressing your ass cheeks?
• What would you do if I was lying naked in your bed?
• From behind or from the front?

During sex

• Do whatever you want with me!
• Please fill me out at last/let me fill you in!
• Harder!
• Oh my god!
• Pull on my hair and f*ck me faster!
• I can’t do more, you’re getting me done!
• Sit back and let me spoil you!
• I love to put my cock in your little wet pussy.
• Your pussy tastes so good on my tongue.
• I can’t believe what you’re doing. Keep going.
• Yes, moan louder. Let everyone know that you’re going through it right now.
• I want to feel your love juice on my skin!
• I beg you, please don’t stop!
• Barrel between my legs and do it to me!
• Put it in your mouth as deep as you can!
• Your body belongs to me tonight.
• You’re so wet. You like what I do with you.
• Sweet, tonight we play by my rules.
• See how hard I get just at the sight of you.
• I’m going to f*ck you so hard until you forget your name!
• You may not come until I allow you to! Otherwise, a penalty awaits you.

After sex

• Nobody f*cks me better than you!
• This was the best orgasm for a long time!
• Do you know that you keep going crazy about me again and again?
• Don’t look at me like that, otherwise I will need a second round.

Hard and dirty – Dirty Talk for particularly kinky nights!

At first glance, talking dirty has little to do with a gentle union of two loving people.

However, if you take a closer look, you can see that trust, dedication and letting go are an important element.

So it is not surprising that the transitions between Dirty Talk, and dominant or submissive lovemaking, are absolutely fluid and interlocked.

You have to find out how far it can go for yourself. Slow down here too, see how your partner reacts and slowly rise to a dominant, harsh tone.

• I’m your master tonight, so keep your mouth down and take off.
• You dirty piece, moan louder when I soak your ass.
• I’ll fuck your dirty hole right away, but before that you can suck my cock.
• If you want me to push my cock into you, beg me pleasingly.
• You were very nasty. I’m going to give you your little sweet butt now.
• Put your pussy in my face!
• Do you know what I do with dirty crap like you?
• I jerked them in the face. So open your mouth!
• Come here you dirty slut!
• I’ll fuck you now until you can’t run anymore!
• Lollipop my dick! Imagine how you feel it in you!
• Moan louder, I want the neighbors to hear you!

Nicknames for his best piece

Call him by name!

When you’re full on in the moment, it can be hard to think up spontaneously nicknames.

We’ve collected some for you, so that you can focus on sex later in bed!

• Joy-Stick
• Goldfinger
• Magic wand
• Pipe
• Lust-stab
• Ass-stab
• Gun
• Banana
• Playboy
• Milk
• Mast
• Bolt
• Casanova
• Device
• Rod
• Hose

Absolute no-go’s, on the other hand, are:

• Gherkin
• Little friend
• Lout
• Noodle
• Anaconda
• Little Willy
• Shell opener
• Meat rocket
• Lusty slingshot
• Names of other men

Nicknames for their pearl!

In fact, more male sex organs with nicknames will understand than female ones!

Nevertheless, it is always good to have some at hand, our selection is of course also to be viewed with a wink!

• Jewellery box
• Crevasse
• Jewel
• Lolli
• Shell
• Love lips
• Lust grotto
• Orchid
• Hotspot
• Sugar snail
• Plums
• Cookie
• Fanny
• Honey pot
• Wetland
• Fortune cookie
• Mandel

No-Go’s, on the other hand, are:

• Drive-In
• Curly hair
• Venus trap
• Snack bars
• Tunnel of Love
• Magic crack

The secret technique – Without touches to orgasm

Now that we have learned a lot about Dirty Talk, and looked at different examples and names, we now know pretty well how to do it. So here we come to the very special technique of kinky language.

Under certain circumstances, it is possible to bring someone to orgasm only with the power of your words (and without any additional stimulation).

The whole thing sounds a bit abstract at first, but it is by no means impossible, or even witchcraft!

All you need for this is a woman who is very well aware of her sexual preferences and her inner pleasures.  

In percentage terms, fewer women get orgasm through this technique alone than when they receive “help” from the outside.

So if you as a man want to make your partner moan with this very special technique, then you need some sensitivity, practice and some knowledge in Dirty Talk.

Create a good climate

Coming to orgasm without touching it, usually takes way longer than during normal sex.

Be aware of this though, because a stressed woman will hardly be able to relax enough to just get going by only your voice.

Give her the feeling she has all the time in the world, maybe close the door and darken the room.

When the eyes are no longer distracted by anything else, it is usually easier to let the excitable images appear in front of their inner mind.

Even a blindfold can help in this case, and perhaps provide an extra little kick.

Slowly touch

If you explain to her directly without a prelude how and if you want to fuck her everywhere, she will react more confused than agitated.

Start carefully, tell her how hot she looks and maybe give a little preview of what you’re going to tell her right away.

You can whisper things in her ear, let your breath then deliberately swipe over her skin, or move around her.

Let your imagination run wild, for the optimal effect it is of course only important that you do not touch.

If you notice that your words are slowly resonating, you can now continue to venture forward.

The more clearly you describe your touches to her, the clearer she will be able to imagine and “feel”.

A simple “I’ll grab you now” doesn’t seem as intense as a “You can feel my fingers a few millimeters away from your nipple.

When I touch you now, it feels like a small burst of electricity and your nipple gets hard almost immediately.

He stretches out to me begging, but my finger moves agonizingly slowly around him. I will make you wait today.

Even the woman is not completely idle here

Even if you play the “inactive” part with this technique, you can make it even easier with a few little tricks.  

The more intensely you imagine his words and take them in, the more your body will react accordingly.

A quiet moaning or slightly open lips can excite you and show you what you like at the same time.

[Reading tip: Do you want to spoil him even more? Use these 13 blowjob tips and he will love you forever! ]

When you’re about to peak,  you can tease your pelvic muscles. This stimulates your vagina and gives you the decisive kick.

But careful, all too often or permanently used, this “leg closure” no longer seems so strong, so use it rather sparingly!

You want to put your body through the torture a little bit, or not?

Our conclusion on Dirty Talk:

Dirty Talk is in many ways more than just “dirty words” in bed. It requires a bit of skill and courage, and used properly it can also ensure true orgasm miracles.

This opens up a whole new world for both partners to discover together, so it certainly won’t get boring in bed anytime soon!

Dirty Talk FAQ

Was it Dirty Talk?

Dirty Talk is a way to talk to your partner. The goal is to build or improve a sexual mood. If the attempt is successful, the arousal increases and the sex is more fun.

How do I learn Dirty Talk?

Learning Dirty Talk isn’t that easy. The difficult thing is: You want to go beyond the normal limit. That’s what excites. But if you exaggerate it, it all goes to pants. So you should start slow and try to increase the pace after a while. Check how your partner reacts. Then keep going.

What do you say about Dirty Talk?

What exactly should you say in Dirty Talk? There are countless templates. The one important thing, however is that never just take the words from another person. Start slowly, climb and change the templates to match YOU!

Did you enjoy reading about Dirty Talk – then why not read our article about Sex Fantasies – Desires and Dreams