Sex during pregnancy – exciting? Will it harm the baby? Plus more questions about safe sex during pregnancy
As long as it’s comfortable, go for it!
If you have sex, can your growing baby listen in during the third trimester?
Well, sure. But the good news? All sounds are well muffled, and your baby can’t understand dirty talk in any language.
But what if you don’t want anything to do with sex? That’s normal. It could be anything from your hormones to getting used to your new body.
“The second trimester is the golden moment,” says Holly Richmond, clinical sex therapist and licensed marriage and family therapist. The worst morning sickness (if you’re blessed with morning sickness at all) is over, and you’re just getting into the curves. In the last trimester, a growing belly can make sex more awkward.
But here’s the basics of everything you’ll learn when it comes to pregnancy sex – All sex is good sex, as long as it’s pleasurable and consensual, Richmond says.
During pregnancy, you may feel anything from erotic to sensual or far from feeling like sex. But don’t fall into the trap of thinking it’s not possible to be pregnant and sexually active.
How safe is sex during pregnancy
Unless your doctor or midwife has strict, specific reasons not to have sex, it is absolutely safe – for you, your partner and your developing baby. (If your doctor or midwife simply says “sex,” don’t be afraid to ask if they mean only penetration or all sexual stimulation.)
At this point, enjoy the knowledge that pregnancy sex is not only safe. It’s probably good for you, too.
Women who orgasm during pregnancy benefit from calming hormones and increased cardiovascular blood flow, and those benefits are passed on to the baby, notes Aleece Fosnight, a physician assistant and sex consultant in urology, women’s health and sexual medicine.
Now you know it’s safe and healthy – so how does it feel?
As a result of hormones, some may feel that their vagina is less “tight.” A combination of factors can cause this, such as more fluid and a change in hormones.
Others find their pelvic floor muscles too tight (as genitals can also become more sensitive), making penetrative sex downright uncomfortable.
When to see the doctor? If pelvic floor symptoms are a persistent problem, get an assessment from your health care provider and ask for a referral to a pelvic floor specialist. Some health care providers minimalise the problem as a result of pregnancy, but she reminds us, “If something doesn’t feel right for you, don’t assume it’s normal for pregnancy.”
You can also have easier orgasms
Stephanie Buehler is the author as well as a psychologist and licensed sex therapist.
She notes, “Some women may orgasm for the first time during pregnancy because of blood flow and hormones.” Some just get it easier.
Sounds great.
But that’s not the whole picture. During pregnancy, your body changes, and each day, week and month can feel different from the last.
Your genitals may be a lot more sensitive
Due to hormonal changes, some women find their sexual appetites becomes more heightened. They just can’t get enough of the sex buffet. What stimulates this craving?
You can blame increased blood flow that occurs during pregnancy. That blood also goes to the vulva, vagina, clitoris and pelvis, making the tissues fuller. Depending on the person, that can feel pleasant, irritating or somewhere in between.
“Men may say they feel more fullness in the vagina, even during the first trimester.”
You may feel a little extra wet
And if you feel a little extra wet – well, you are.
It is normal for there to be more vaginal discharge and lubrication, mostly to fight bacteria (and bacterial infections). There is little you can do about this, it happens naturally. A convenient benefit along with easier arousal.
Will penetration harm pregnancy?
The simple answer is, No.
During penetration, the uterus may move a little and you can sometimes feel that, but not always. People are afraid something will happen to the baby. In fact, the uterus is just more mobile during pregnancy. Kind of like a mobile home.
The baby is super protected and has its own filtering system that is very selective about what goes in and comes out,” notes Fosnight. “Unless you’ve been instructed to take pelvic rest, sex is OK.”
Pelvic rest can be prescribed for problems such as an incomplete cervix or placenta previa.
However, one survey found that 80 percent of men worry about “hurting the baby.” If necessary, take your partner with you to your next gynecological appointment. However, certain positions can obviously become difficult because of the bulge in the belly. Search together for a comfortable position
Is it normal to have dreams with orgasms during pregnancy?
Yes. Many women have amazing “wet dreams” or sleep orgasms when pregnant.
Another bonus due to higher estrogen levels and increased blood flow. This will probably decrease after delivery, so enjoy it!” Orgasms and sex during pregnancy is common!
Is there anything sexual that is unsafe?
If you’re hoping to practice a little 50 Shades of Pregnancy, go ahead – as long as you and your partner have experience with floggers, rope, and more.
If you are the recipient of spanking, your partner should avoid the abdomen and lower abdomen and any knot that can constrict blood flow. If you are new to the world, wait to put the restraints on until after pregnancy (and a full night’s sleep).
Also, set limits on what is acceptable when you begin.
And while anal sessions and riding a Hitachi are perfectly fine, don’t allow anyone to blow air into your vagina. Although rare, blowing air into the vagina can lead to embolisms and even death.
When can I start having sex after my baby is born?
As one study noted, the standard recommendation is about six weeks. Women with few complications often begin having sex again earlier, as long as there is no tearing or infection.
Check with your obstetrician or gynecologist to see which camp you belong in.
Sex positions for couples
When it comes to sex during pregnancy, stick to positions that keep the pressure and weight off your belly. This will likely be more comfortable for you and your pregnant partner.
Also, stick to positions that don’t involve lying on your back. This way you will avoid obstructing the blood flow, which can lead to dizziness and other problems.
9 positions to try with fat belly
Doggy style
Cowgirl
Spoon spoon
Reverse Cowgirl
Standing
Lotus Posture
Oral sex
Anal sex
Side-by-side sex
For extra comfort, invest in sex pillows (yes, you can even use your pregnancy pillow for support), lube and sex toys. Sex does not require penetration for maximum pleasure. Instead, focus on stimulating the clitoris with toys or your fingers. Not necessarily only sex during pregnancy(s).
Positions best avoided
Missionary position (lying on the woman’s stomach) is not a good idea because it interferes with the blood supply to mother and baby, especially after the 20th week.
Some find prone position (lying flat on the belly) uncomfortable.
And as every doctor and pregnancy book will ever tell you, don’t blow air into it.
No matter where you are in the trimester, figuring out how to get around the challenges during pregnancy sex can be a time of experimentation and positions. Think of it as a time to jump out of the band.
Focus on positives during pregnancy sex
Being pregnant and being sexy are not mutually exclusive. Neither is a hot relationship in the middle of pregnancy.
“Just before the arrival of the baby, which is going to siphon off a lot of that erotic energy, you can reinvigorate your sex life,” suggests Dr. Rosara Torrisi.
The experimentation and flexibility you enjoy now can help keep your relationship sexually satisfying for decades. A new boost can happen “with each pregnancy, at each stage of pregnancy, and every few years to keep the bedroom spicy,” Torrisi says.
The only constant during pregnancy and a relationship is change. “If something is no longer enjoyable, look for what is enjoyable now,” she suggests.
On the real end of a pregnancy
Some will feel free to miss that fat belly, but the third trimester is a tough time even when it goes smoothly and pleasantly, and some will find it comforting that sometimes, that you can use sex to induce the: induce labor!
When you have an orgasm, oxytocin is released. You need this hormone for labor. This hormone causes your uterus to contract, which can be just that extra push for labor. But lovemaking also works in another way – sperm contains the hormone prostaglandin. This is prostaglandin which causes the cervix to soften. Please note that sex is not recommended when there are broken membranes, this is to reduce the risk of infection.
Sex during pregnancy, although some men and women find this really exciting, we really recommend just doing it! Unless a medical specialist says not, but otherwise definitely!